Apparently...

According to my junk mail, I can increase my penis size by one to three inches, with a viagra substitute.

Logically thinking, that means I would have a one to three inch penis.

Any way you look at it, it's still not worth bragging about.

Or maybe its a one two.three inch (12.3") penis? That would be worth bragging about...

Hell... That would put Ron Jeremy out of career options.

Yes, Ladies and Germs, I've seen my fair share of dirty, dirty porn. And most of it, though visually stimulating, is poor quality, and some of it even has a PLOT! WTF is up with a PLOT in porn? I just want action. I don't want dialogue. Shut the Fuck up, slap your ass mister, and get it on already.

Also, a GNN (Glamazon Network News) newsflash for you Local Vancouverite Yokels that are a fan of singing the lyrics to poorly redone midi-file songs in front of large crowds of people.

There was a huge lull on Monday evenings for Karaoke in this city after The Roxy stopped holding it's "Vancouver Idol" contest, which I attended quite frequently, and even ended up getting into the semi-finalist stage once or twice by singing some Aretha. (Unfortunately, my tits weren't big enough, (or my arse wasn't small enough) to grant me enough applause from the jailbait that was responsible for deciding who won the nights event. I guess breast size beats out actual TALENT, ten to one.)

Granted, I haven't actually attended Karaoke in a coon's age, (over three and a half months) and I've been chomping at the bit to go again. They've started it up again at The Buffalo Club on Granville Street, which is cause for mild alarum in the Karaoke clique-age that has developed in this city (the fact that there even IS one, is mildly disturbing.) Apparently it's the same DJ (DJ Tom) that hosted the Roxy Karaoke, and all in all, he's a pretty good host alongside his sidekick Don G. Swinger, previously the Bassist for the 90's Rock band "The Odds."

Always an entertaining devilish duo. Although I'm not sure if Don is going to be accompanying Tom at this particular venue.

According to Glamazon sources, karaoke goes on until closing time.. (I figure that's about 11pm, due to the fact that it's a Monday.)

Goody. I need to practice before I head on down to Dallas anyways.