Downtrodden Song...

Music of the Moment: Ray Charles -- "Hard Times"


Seems to me, that even though I'm almost religious about putting entries in here, it's not nearly as sastisfying is it was previously.

True enough, people told me they missed my writing when I was M.I.A. a few months ago, but honestly, what the fuck am I writing that's relevant to anyone else? I should just stop entirely for a while.

Who am I kidding. I'm addicted. If I don't get it out this way, I get it out in more self-destructive methods, it's just the way I am.

I'm feeling absolutely haggard.

I've been discussing work with my business partner for the last four days, trying to redesign this website, (which is having issues due to the fact that she's got issues with her laptop, that I am unfortunately unable to fix.) and it's whole corporate identity in general. We're arranging to have professional photographs taken, organize how we are getting fetish gear, and the other myriad assortment of bits and bobs associated with it, including registering it as a legal business partnership with the B.C. Small Business Association, and trying to find a 2 bedroom apartment in a nicer area of Vancouver to set up as a working space. We're also contemplating changing our domain name, and running it through a different server. This whole series of events, is damned expensive, so we're trying to do this at minimum cost with minimum sacrifice of quality product.

It's an arduous process, and because of both of our schedules, it's starting to feel like slogging knee-deep through molasses.

We just spent over three hours in a meeting, and quite frankly my eyes were starting to glaze over by the end of it. I'm interested, but I'm not fanatical.

Not yet, anyways.

I know that running a business isn't easy. I never went into the situation expecting it to BE easy. However, it's even more difficult when it's two students behind the whole thing, with limited schedules.

I'm angry again. It's a mixture of my inability to do things RIGHT NOW, that need to be done, regarding this, and a big dollop of sexual frustration and loneliness to top it all off.

I finally saw my old assistant and good friend Mark, this Sunday. For the first time in almost a month. It was great to hang out with him, flirt somewhat like the tramp I was at one point in my life, and hear how horrifying a Safeway Bakery Management position can truly be.

I'm VERY glad I got out of there when I did. However I'm still exceedingly proud of him for making it to that level. I hated the position I had, and I was never suited as an actual full-on manager. I could easily pull off assistant manager though, and was told so on a regular basis.

He's exceedingly well suited for it, and I always knew that. I've been telling him that from the get go.

That's right. I'm a regular fucking cheerleader. Go team.

Congratulations, "Legs." Hang in there. It's only rough for the first while. (But we all know you like it that way. :P)

I miss hanging out with my friends an enormous amount. I'm sorry guys. You still rock my socks though!